I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
