So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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