I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
