so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
