Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize