Define "chronic" masturbator.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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