Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
