Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
