I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
