I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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