Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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