New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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