Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
