for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
