Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
