Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
