break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Me too!
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
