Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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