if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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