the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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