i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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