it hurts more in the daytime
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
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