i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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