Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You are the jesus of drinking
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize