You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
