I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
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