I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize