Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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