Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
