Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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