I wannas sexs uuuuu
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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