And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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