Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
