Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
