I wish I could punch you in the face.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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