How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
thus making me awesome and them whores
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
