Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
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Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
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I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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