Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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