I must be too annoying 4 u.
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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