i was rollin on her like bob the builder
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
