Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass