he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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