First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize