If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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