So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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