Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
