Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
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I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
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Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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