if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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