Where did you get a picture of my penis
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
