3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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