I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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